COMFORT ZONE: THE SECRET TO GET OUT OF IT

Everyone wants to have a GOOD LIFE and what the majority of people associate with it is having an EASY LIFE.

A life that doesn’t imply challenges, setbacks, pain, effort, responsibility, and discomfort.

A life where everything goes well, without ups and downs.  

That’s not possible, in fact, according to the Law of Duality, everything has a complementary opposite.

So if COMFORT and DISCOMFORT are the two sides of the same coin and YOU cannot experience one without avoiding the other, the same holds for every aspect of your life. 

To feel COMFORTABLE YOU MUST also feel UNCOMFORTABLE!

When and where does the UNCOMFORTABLE feeling take place?

It occurs at any time YOU do something NEW, whenever you take the unbeaten track, i.e. every time YOU get out of your COMFORT ZONE.

It’s in this unknown place that YOU can GROW, EVOLVE, and BECOME a BETTER VERSION of yourself.

So, it’s only in this space that YOU can learn who YOU are, what beliefs drive YOU, and what YOU are capable of.

WHAT ARE THE 4 TYPES OF RESISTANCE TO ANY CHANGE?

1) BIOLOGICAL RESISTANCE

Our biological systems are hardwired for:

  • survival,
  • least possible energy wasting.

For this reason, any time YOU try to do something NEW, the survival mode turns ON.

It detects YOU are running the risk of incurring PAIN and DISCOMFORT and it pushes YOU back into your safe zone.

2) SOCIAL RESISTANCE

How often have YOU found yourself held back by other people’s conditioning?

The people most close to YOU, your family, relatives, and friends have a BIG INFLUENCE when it comes to STARTING something NEW.

Even if they want to help YOU, they are unconsciously preventing YOU from taking the STEP that can lead to your personal development.

Have YOU ever been told: 

“it’s better the devil YOU know than the devil YOU don’t”.

or

“if YOU do it YOU may jump out of the frying pan into the fire”.

When YOU hear these statements, especially if they come from your loved ones, YOU are likely to end up believing them.

Once YOU adopt them, YOU sabotage yourself from taking action.

YOU start thinking:

“life happens to ME”,

instead of embracing the belief:

“I am the creator of MY life”.

3) EMOTIONAL RESISTANCE

When YOU are about to START something NEW, YOU can be overwhelmed by IRRATIONAL FEARS.

Does it happen to YOU?

Most of the time we can be anxious about taking the unknown path, we can be afraid of what we could encounter because as human beings we always look for CERTAINTY.

YOU cannot find it when YOU step out of your COMFORT ZONE; that’s why YOU experience unpleasant feelings.

Such feelings STOP YOU from expressing your true power.

4) RATIONAL RESISTANCE

As human beings, we are more likely to FOCUS on the CHALLENGES and OBSTACLES a change entails, than on the possible BENEFITS.

By focusing on the CONS instead of the PROS YOU discourage and sabotage yourself from breaking through.

THE SECRET TO STEP OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE: TWO MOTIVATING FORCES THAT SHAPE EVERY ASPECT OF YOUR LIFE

MOTIVATION is the key ingredient to foster your change, to get out of your COMFORT ZONE, and gain LONG-TERM results.

It’s of extreme importance both to start something NEW and to overcome the pitfalls that happen in your life.

But...

How can YOU CREATE and FEED your MOTIVATION to follow through and achieve whatever YOU want out of your life?

What is the SECRET that enables YOU to TAKE FULL CONTROL of your DESTINY and your SUCCESS in any area of your life?

The SECRET resides in two MOTIVATING FORCES: PAIN and PLEASURE.  

They are the controlling forces of your life.

They shape YOU all the time.

Whenever YOU make a choice YOU use the “PAIN/PLEASURE LEVER”, even if YOU are NOT AWARE.

Your PROCRASTINATION and your BREAKING THROUGH are directly related to these two elements.

For many people, the need to avoid PAIN is a GREATER MOTIVATOR than the desire for PLEASURE.

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What happens when the PAIN MOTIVATOR exceeds the PLEASURE one?

YOU procrastinate, YOU sabotage yourself from following through!

The FIRST STEP to change your life for the better is being AWARE of what YOU LINK your PAIN and PLEASURE to.

Think for a moment about the things that YOU have MISSED in your life.

Things like making a call to your former colleagues, asking the girl YOU liked so much out, saying sorry to your parents for misbehaving, etc. 

Why did YOU fail to do them?

Because, even if YOU wanted the pleasure of making those things happen, your brain told YOU:

“If YOU go for them, YOU will experience PAIN!”. 

YOU FOCUSED more on the PAIN than on the PLEASURE

By understanding that YOU always make your choices based on whether YOU let your fear of the ensuing PAIN prevail over the hope for PLEASURE, YOU will be able to use these 2 MOTIVATING FORCES as ALLIES to thrive and succeed. 

What you MUST do is to consider the ensuing PLEASURE more important than the PAIN associated with the choice YOU are making.

If YOU want to change something in your life YOU’d better START having FULL CONTROL of the FOCUS within your mind.

YOU are responsible for every choice YOU make. 

Any time YOU need or want to change something in your life but YOU are in a PROCRASTINATION mode YOU are FOCUSING ON:

“What PAIN is going to be caused by taking action”?

To switch from PROCRASTINATION to ACTION YOU MUST ask yourself:

  • “How not doing something is going to be MORE PAINFUL than just GOING for it”?
  • “What not following through is going to cost ME (emotionally, financially, physically, spiritually)"?
  • “What am I going to miss from this opportunity if I don’t go for it”?
  • “How am I going to feel in one year if I don’t pursue my GOALS”?
  • “To which extent not taking action will affect my health, wealth, and relationships”?

YOU MUST picture in your mind and live the UNPLEASANT emotions and feelings that stem from not taking action.

At the end of the day, your EMOTIONS drive YOU, so YOU’d better make sure YOU summon those that ENCOURAGE YOU rather than those that HOLD YOU BACK.

Now that YOU have understood the SECRET PRINCIPLE of MOTIVATION YOU have 3 choices:

  1. apply it and achieve whatever YOU want no matter the obstacles YOU will face,
  2. not pay attention to it and carry on  procrastinating your success till YOU eventually give it up,
  3. wait till YOU hit rock bottom when the PAIN caused by not taking action is so BIG that YOU can no longer stay confined in your COMFORT ZONE and are compelled to act differently.

What is your choice?

Will YOU start moving forward and taking control of your life or will YOU stay in your COMFORT ZONE where there’s no room for your PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT?

5 TIPS THAT WALK YOU TO START MAKING THE MOST OUT OF THE PAIN/PLEASURE PRINCIPLE

1) write on a paper 3 things that YOU MUST do in your life and that YOU have been putting off (e.g. START my OWN BUSINESS, LEARN NEW SKILLS, INVEST IN MYSELF, SURROUND myself with LIKE-MINDED PEOPLE, find out the STRATEGIES that SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE who have already achieved my GOALS have USED...),

2)be open and honest with yourself and write down for each of those 3 things the PAIN YOU associate with them, what has prevented YOU from breaking through (e.g. starting my own business is TOO EXPENSIVE, learning NEW skills is VERY DIFFICULT and it TAKES plenty of TIME and ENERGY, I am NOT GOOD ENOUGH to invest in my personal development and it implies spending money, finding like-minded people nowadays is REALLY DIFFICULT and I will RUN the RISK to be JUDGED and REFUSED…),

3)write down for each of those 3 things all the PLEASURE YOU have gotten by not moving forward (e.g. time spent/“wasted” WATCHING TV SERIES, on SOCIAL NETWORKS...),

4)be clear and honest with yourself and write down for each of those 3 things what not changing your behavior will COST YOU in the next few years (e.g. I will be STUCK in the same JOB I HATE running the CORPORATE RAT RACE, I will TRADE my TIME for MONEY, I will NOT HAVE TIME to ENJOY the COMPANY of the PEOPLE I LOVE, I will wait for the WEEKEND to feel a bit of RELIEF, I will feel MISERABLE…)

5)write down for each of those 3 things what YOU will GAIN in the next few years by taking action right NOW (e.g. I will have MY OWN BUSINESS, I will be MY OWN BOSS, I will be FINANCIALLY SELF-RELIANT, I will have TIME and GEOGRAPHICAL FREEDOM, I will be part of a COMMUNITY of LIKE-MINDED PEOPLE where I will feel understood, I will be able to SUPPORT and ENJOY MY FAMILY…),

Investing time in writing down what is mentioned in the above bullet points is of pivotal importance to take advantage of the PAIN/PLEASURE principle.

It clarifies which limiting beliefs, behaviors, convictions, and habits drive your decisions.

As a result, YOU will start applying the powerful principle of the 2 MOTIVATING FORCES in your daily routine.

YOU will be able to get out of your COMFORT ZONE and feel the excitement of taking a different track.

YOU will shape your life based on what YOU want!

Check out how YOU feel after following the above 5 tips and let me know.

If YOU feel empowered and enthusiastic YOU are on your way to START creating the life YOU want.

If YOU feel discouraged, that’s normal, it’s something YOU are NOT USED TO DOING, at least YOU have got out of your COMFORT ZONE

YOU have taken the FIRST STEP.

Well done!

If YOU don’t bother to follow my suggestions, YOU are still in the PROCRASTINATION mode.

Let me remind YOU, your behavior has led YOU where YOU are right NOW.

If YOU are not satisfied with your life YOU MUST CHANGE DIRECTION

“If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got”. - Henry Ford

I have decided to use the PAIN/PLEASURE LEVER to my ADVANTAGE.

Getting out of my COMFORT ZONE has never been so easy after applying the principle.

Thanks to that I have started pursuing my GOAL, having a LIFESTYLE with more FREEDOM and PASSION for what I DO

NOW it’s up to YOU whether YOU FOLLOW THROUGH, get out of your COMFORT ZONE, and live life on your OWN TERMS

"Life begins at the end of your comfort zone". - Neale Donal Walsch

Christian Caliendo
Christian Caliendo

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