No one is exempt from it, every one of us has made it! In one way or another, we have come up with an excuse in any aspect of our lives.
In this post, you're going to find out what the most common excuses preventing you from living your dream life are and how to get rid of them.
First thing first, let’s start getting more clear about those killers of dreams.
What are excuses? And, why do we use them so often?
Excuses are nothing more than lies we tell ourselves.
We use them to rationalize and justify why we take the easy path, why we don’t take action towards our dreams.
I am a great believer that we can become whoever we want to be and achieve whatever we want to accomplish, provided we stop making excuses and start taking actions aligned with our goals.
Excuses and negative self-talk are commonalities we all have that hold us from fulfilling our dreams.
Most of us are not aware of it, and it’s not until we become conscious of how disempowering excuses and negative self-talk are that we can choose to get rid of them and take the path towards our dreams.
Nobody will come and rescue us from where we are.
Nobody will change our lives; we are the only ones who can make our dreams come true.
Our lives are exactly what we choose.
We always make choices, and the results we get depend on the choices we make; thus if we are not getting the outcomes we want, we only need to make different choices.
“Maturity is when you stop complaining and making excuses in your life; you realize everything that happens in life is a result of the previous choice you’ve made and start making new choices to change your life”. - Roy Bennett
You can either be a victim of your life or a master of it but the choice is always yours.
It all comes down to stop making excuses and start taking action.
If you are not satisfied with your life, whether in terms of finances, relationships, health, or emotions there’s only one path you can take to solve your dissatisfaction and it’s called: CHANGE!
Are you feeling like you have no say in your life?
I am here to tell YOU, that like I did, YOU can also start a new chapter of your life anytime, you can change your current circumstances.
You can change anything whenever you want, provided you stop lying to yourself with another excuse.
My questions to you are:
How badly do you want to live your dream life, whatever it means to you?
Will you keep lying to yourself and be stuck where you are pretending everything is ok, or will you leave your excuses behind and make the necessary changes to live your dream life?
It's easier to accept your current situation and keep lying to yourself than to take massive actions and make your dreams come true. Isn't it?
However, your dream life doesn’t care how tired, broken, old, depressed you may feel; it doesn’t care about the next excuse you may come up with; the only thing your dream life cares about is you taking massive action.
One of the few things that are guaranteed in our lives is that if we don’t change, nothing will change either.
It all comes down to forcing ourselves to do the stuff we don’t feel like, to forcing ourselves to do exactly the opposite of what our excuses suggest we do.
Luckily self-discipline is a skill that can be learned and mastered and I wrote a post you want to make yours!
In it, you will find tips to build lasting and solid self-discipline to help you create your dream life.
“With self-discipline most anything is possible”. - Theodore Roosevelt
Let’s now dive into the most common excuses you may have been unconsciously using and find out how to get rid of them.
1) I DON’T HAVE ENOUGH TIME
We all have the same amount of hours at our disposal.
You, I, and the most successful person on the planet have 24 hrs a day.
So, why do some people achieve great accomplishments while others do not?
The reason lies in how you use your time, your most precious resource.
Successful people don’t waste their time doing something that doesn't serve them and doesn’t take them closer to their goals.
Successful people plan ahead, they schedule their daily, weekly, and sometimes even monthly to-do list.
In doing so they prioritize what their most important tasks are, and they make sure they get them done.
When something is truly important to you, you find the time!
My questions to you are:
How important is living your dream life?
How many hours a day do you waste in activities that will never help you create this kind of life?
How many hours a day do you spend scrolling social media, surfing the net, watching TV series, and playing video games?
Commit yourself for 1 week to keeping track of the number of hours you “spend” doing the above activities and you’ll be surprised by how many hours you actually have to start building your dream life if you stop wasting them.
I did it myself, and by realizing how many hours I was wasting, I decided to use all those hours to start pursuing my dreams.
Honestly, it has been one of the best choices I’ve ever made.
Nowadays instead of scrolling through social media, I read topics relevant to my goals, instead of watching Netflix I write the posts you read, instead of playing video games I widen my network of friends.
All my free time is devoted to building my dream life. “I don’t have time” is no longer an excuse for me.
“It is not that we have a short time to live, but that we waste a lot of it. Life is long enough, and a sufficiently generous amount has been given to us for the highest achievements if it were all well invested. But when it is wasted in heedless luxury and spent on no good activity, we are forced at last by death’s final constraint to realize that it has passed away before we knew it was passing. So it is: we are not given a short life but we make it short, and we are not ill-supplied but wasteful of it… Life is long if you know how to use it”. - Seneca, On the Shortness of Life
To help you make the most out of your 24 hrs, find “extra useful time” and assure you get stuff done I wrote this post for you: YOUR TIME IS LIMITED, DON’T WASTE IT!
2) I AM TOO OLD OR I AM TOO YOUNG
Regardless of your age, you can accomplish everything. However, you must have a burning desire and be willing to put in the work.
Whether it is in sport, business, relationships, or any other field you can find both old and young people achieving outstanding results.
If you are old, it means that you have already gone through many experiences in your life and this makes you a wise person.
You have already experienced what making mistakes, having disappointments, dealing with struggles is all about; thus you have a big arsenal of skills to use to achieve whatever dream you have.
Do you know who Karl Lagerfeld is?
He was the creative director of the French fashion house Chanel.
Although Karl pursued fashion from the age of 14, it’s only later in life he made a transformation to reign as head designer at Chanel at the age of 82.
This is just one of the many testimonials that show that it’s never too late to follow your dreams and make your mark.
On the other hand, if you are young, you have all the energy and enthusiasm necessary to make your dreams come true.
I bet you have heard about Greta Thunberg who became Time Magazine’s Person of the Year as a teenager!
Therefore, stop being a victim of your age.
You are neither too young nor too old, you are just ready to pursue your dreams.
3) IT’S NOT THE RIGHT TIME NOW, I’LL START LATER
There will never be the perfect conditions you are waiting for to start pursuing your dreams.
Perfection doesn’t exist, so forget about it and stop procrastinating.
Just take the first tiny step, and then, keep going and before you realize you will have gone the distance.
The best time to start building your dream life was yesterday, the second-best time is NOW.
“The past is the past, and the future is yet to come. That means the future is in your hands – the future entirely depends on the present. That realization gives you a great responsibility”. - Dalai Lama XIV
So don’t wait for tomorrow, don’t postpone your dream life, you have been doing it for a while, haven’t you?
If you are anything like me, you are craving for a better life, so, start now wherever you are, with whatever you have, even if the “perfect conditions” aren’t in place.
It’s not about perfectionism, it’s about progression.
Don’t let your “later” become “never”, don’t let your “maybe” become “no”.
4) I DON’T KNOW WHERE TO START FROM
Whatever your goal is, there is someone who has already walked the path and succeeded in the journey you want to start.
Find them and ask them for help, ask them to teach you how to start and get where you want to go.
It all comes down to modeling someone who has already achieved the results you are looking for.
Learning from people who have already achieved success allows you to shorten your journey towards your destination as well as to avoid making common mistakes.
When I decided to start my venture online I was as unsure as you are.
I didn’t know where to start from, but I found someone who had already accomplished the goal I was aiming at, and as a result, I finally did start.
5) I DON’T HAVE ENOUGH MONEY OR RESOURCES
If you are anything like me, you have already used this excuse.
If you don't have the resources you need, be more resourceful!
If you don't have the money necessary to start whatever you want to achieve you could consider asking your parents to lend you some money.
If you do not have a great relationship with them, you could opt for a loan, or even convince investors to invest in you, in your project.
What about crowdfunding?
What about giving up smoking, or whatever vice you may have, and start saving the money needed to start pursuing your dreams?
Bottom line: if you want your dream so badly you will find all the resources you need even if you may not have them right now.
Way too often anyway, behind the excuse of not having enough money the fear of failure is hidden.
What I mean by that is that many people are too afraid to invest money because they believe they will fail, and so, they will lose their initial investment.
This was something that used to scare the hell out of me, but then I realized that investing money in myself, in learning new skills was the best investment I could ever make and the only way I could make my dreams come true.
Nobody can take away from us the skills we learn when we invest in ourselves.
What’s more, I‘ve concluded that people fail only when they give up.
This is a universal principle: if you are heading in the right direction and you keep moving you will eventually get to your destination.
No matter how many setbacks you may have, keep going, and sooner or later you’ll make it happen.
6) IT’S TOO HARD
Pursuing your dreams is not going to be a walk in the park, that’s for sure.
Expecting to experience success without sacrifice is naive.
But my question to you is:
What’s harder? The temporary discomfort and effort required to make your dreams come true or a permanent life of regret?
For me, the answer was a no-brainer one.
I was determined to do whatever it took to pursue my dreams no matter how many challenges came my way.
I knew I could stand anything, the only thing I could not stand was to get to the end of my life knowing I could have done more, I could have made my life a masterpiece.
7) MY PARENTS, MY FRIENDS, MY SPOUSE THINK THAT FOLLOWING MY DREAMS IS UNREALISTIC
Have those people achieved what you want to pursue?
If not, why should you give a damn of what they think?
I used to share my dreams with my family and friends, and the more I told them, the more they advised me to give up on them.
But, becoming aware that I was speaking to people who had never achieved the same dreams I was shooting for woke me up and made me stop listening to their advice.
Your excuses can be different, but they share one common trait - they keep you far away from who you want to become, from the life you are dreaming about.
“Excuses are the nails used to build a house of failure”. - Jim Rohn
The first step towards living your dream life is to become aware of how disempowering they are and the next step is to take action.
The sooner you realize that any time you make an excuse you are literally lying to yourself the sooner you’ll be willing to get rid of those excuses.
I’ve been there too. I used to lie to myself all the time. I was really good at it!
I came up with fancy excuses for which I shouldn’t start following my dreams.
Before long those excuses piled up to the point that I was living a miserable life.
Only when I decided to no longer make excuses, did my life shift.
If you really want to make a change, be honest with yourself.
Make this statement yours: “I am going to pursue my dreams and I will no longer lie to myself, I will no longer make excuses”!
Stop looking for excuses and start looking for opportunities.